Tis the Season for the Apocalypse?

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I would like to make an announcement.  The world is coming to an end.  Prepare yourselves.

How can I be so sure, you might ask?  Simply, for once in my life I am on top of all my Christmas preparations.  I assure you that this is a sure sign of the coming Apocalypse.  Or possibly a Christmas miracle.

Let's look at the evidence:

1.  All of my Christmas decorations were up two days after Thanksgiving.  The tree was trimmed and the wreaths were hung.  I even managed to set up the four trillion Department 56 North Pole Village houses.  I'm not sure how it happened, but everything was up in record time.
 
2.  My Christmas shopping is 99% done.  I did a the majority of my shopping on line, as usual.  The fact that I don't have to fight traffic and crowds really seems to speed up the process.  

Once everything arrives in the mail, it shouldn't take too long to do the wrapping.  I don't know about you, but that's one of my favorite things to do.  I better stock up on Scotch tape.

3.  I finished addressing my Christmas cards yesterday and dropped them in the mail this morning.  Never have my cards gone out this early.  Scores of families are sure to be amazed by my card mailing prowess.  

4.  I have already baked five different types of Christmas cookies.  While I still have a few more to make, the assortment of treats at my house is unusual for this time of year.  
It just occurred to me that this might not be a good thing.  If I'm not careful, I may need to buy new pants by the time Christmas arrives. 

Impressive isn't it?  I'm sure that you have come to the same conclusion as me...  This can only be the result of the end of the age.  It's a once-in-a-lifetime kind-of occurrence.

How about you, dear readers?  How are your Christmas preparations coming along?